someday

behind my smile is a hurting heart, behind my laugh I am falling apart look closely and you will see the girl that's dying inside of me. Honestly I am just tired. I want to start over and make everything right but I can't. I am not saying I don't want to live but I am so close to being suicidal. I don't want to life a life full of mistakes and right now my whole being is a mistake. I don't deserve everything that I have. I guess I am used to the fact that I am invisible to everyone but myself. I would like to think that there is someone who actually truly cares for me but the truth is no one does. I trust no one in this world because there is no one worth trusting. I used to think that maybe I could trust Trisha or Dannie or even Tala but now I know I can't. everyday I slowly fall apart into pieces and there isn't anyone to pick up the pieces. I really do want to trust you but I can't and now I know that. after everything I have done for you this is how you repay me? if this is how your going to treat me then maybe I don't want to be your friend. What's the point of having friends if they are just going to end up leaving you? when will there be prince charming or superman? I always used to think that someday maybe someday someone will come.